Well, isn't it about time that i FINALLY posted a PROPER blog post?? haha. AS USUAL, it's been AGES as all of you who know me and follow my life and such.. lols I am forever busy. ahha. Lately, I've been busy with many gigs and such, which has been great. I am priviledged to have such great opportunities. Although there are also many other sacrifices that I had and have to make along the way to give way to my passions and gaining these new experiences, I believe that they will all be worth it. And all this defines who I am.
In just a blink of an eye, I am down to the last school term of my Polytechnic studies for my Diploma in Experience & Product Design.
Wow, like... I still remember just graduating from secondary school back in 2008, not exactly knowing what was in store for me in my life. And now, I am going through that again.. but on an even bigger scale..! Because it is the last term, it also means something else... GRADUATION.
Which also leads to.... Plans for the future. omgosh. I know for sure that I would like to further my studies, AKA University. Now in this day and time, and especially in Singapore, it's very important to at least have a degree to be somewhat- successful..? [but of course you must continue to work hard after that] not saying that you can't get a job or whatsoever if you do not get a degree.. it's just a silly little piece of paper [okay, and with a little bit of expierence that comes along with it] that helps you to get into that portal of the scary working world... haaaaa
and afterwhich, it does not really matter what you work as anymore. AHHA. it is true, based on many other people's own first hand experience. However, knowing this, i'd think that it would be best to not waste those 3-4 years of studies doing something I do not ever intend to do anyway.. ahha. soo.....
I have not 100% decided on which course exactly I want to do... but i know almost for sure that it will be something to do with the Arts/Media. I'm just slightly disappointed that I did not grant myself that realisation those few years ago when applying for Poly. I did know it back then, but i didnt know for sure if i wanted it so badly. I thought that design would give me more room and market to work with. unfortunately, after these few years in the field, i must say that i still enjoy design... but i do not wish to work in the industry after seeing what it is like.. haha.. well, at least not for long periods of time. I need an active social life. lolz. then again, I can't say that i regret it at all as I have gained soooooooo many wonderful experiences and met many amazing people in the course of these few years in Poly which i think might not have happened if i did not choose this path.
I truly believe that no matter what, everybody's story has already been written and all. everything that happens in your life, happens for a reason. it may not seem right or have any meaning when it happens.. but one day it will. it could be that one little tiny thing like, meeting a stranger on the streets that totally changes your life forever. Life's a journey. not a race. of course, it is good to have some ideas where you will end u eventually... but don't forget to have fun on the way and enjoy life. seize the day. :)
Although I feel totally unprepared, I am quite set on going to Canada to further my studies after i get my diploma... School starts in end of Aug, if i am not wrong.. for the winter intake.. I got to start applying NOW... before feb 2012.. to make sure I can get a place. I have a feeling that.. although aug may sound like quite some time from now... think about it.. remember my 2 mth trip to China for that immersion programme? my goodness, it's almost been half a year since I've come back already..! 0.o
I know that going to Canada will open my eyes, road and experienes and exposure sooo much more..!! but then again, there are so many things that I am very unwilling to let go of.. or put on hold.. i don't know.. moving to another country [though it's supposed to be my hometown] feels like.. a timemachine. it's like... putting everything you have on hold.. freeze mode.. and you go away to like.. live another life.. but that isnt what happens. life goes on in Singapore. people grow up and apart, things change, buildings are torn down and rebuilt every few years.. the thought of CHANGE scares me.. not like i'm the only one..
and not like things will not change if i stay here because they will.. just that I somehow can witness it with my own eyes..
I really love that feeling when you meet up with your old buddies, just sit down.. have tea and chat.. it just feels so wonderful to have a touch of something that has been gone for awhile.. that touch of familiarity. it brings you back to a time... but when you snap out of it. you are back to reality. not that it is bad or anything.. it's just.. different.
I've realised so many things in the past 3 years and I think i've really grown up quite a bit, mentally. you may say 3 years is a short period of time.. it is..! but at the same time, so many things have happened which were life changing..
I was reading some of my older posts recently.. haaa, the things i used to blog about.. there was one... 'things i remember about 2009' looking back at that made me feel that the year, although it passed by really quickly... it was meaningful and many things that happened that year REALLY changed my life.. SO MUCH. and many people i've met who will change my life forever as well.
I think i am going to do that end of this year too.. like some sort of a summary of what happened this year.. and who are the people i've met.. things i've done and such. :) be it good of bad.
I apologize for not having a very clear direction or stand in this post. i am just sort of 'thinking out loud' here.. Kind of like how I like to share intimate chats with my close friends who are good listeners.. I will wander into my own little world.. and talk about different things.. and some self reflections here and there..
much as many people think my life is all perfect and wonderful.. is is not. and neither is it bad. I just want to say that everyone has to go through some sort of obstacles in their life some way or another.. so here is a shoutout to all those friends who are going through some tough times. You are not alone. whatever it is, never give up. :)
okay, back t the topic which i keep digressing from... haha..
Growing up... nobody ever said it was easy.. but it sure is tough knowing that you've grown up to a point where you really have to make your own decisions which will be life changing, no matter what you choose. and also, because you lack of the experience, you will not know what the outcome WILL BE until you try it out. the only thing you can do is to somehow predict or assume how the scenario will be like if you make a certain decision.
man, this has been bugging me for the past 3 years, really.. but i've always thought that i had a lot of time before i had to make that decision... but now i'm having lesser and lesser time.. ugh. much as i hate growing up so fast, i kind of not have much of a choice but to finally accept the facts soon and know that i have to face it and decide. and just do it..!
I guess the main things holding me back are well, the people and things that i hold dear to me. not that they will change my decisions much... but i just can't help but to think of them and what would happen and such.
For those worrying and thinking that you'll miss me, haha. fret not because there is always the internet!! hahaha and also, I will AT LEAST be back in Singapore after my uni to work for 3 years. AT LEAST. [tution grant... ahaahhah] so yeah... and bearing that in mind, do meet me up before it's too late!!!
I shall end this topic for this post here... with the reminder to... while being realistic, still always believe in your hopes and dreams. one day you will get there :) If you can dream it, you can be it.
To all my beloved friends who may be going through similar delimas and such as I am, all the best to you! and do feel free to come have a chat with me anytime! :) We will pull through!! this is a mega huge step that everybody has to go through some point in their lives..
CHEERS!! :)))
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And, I'd like to give a shoutout to my dear army boy, Sean Liew Guo Liang!! :D I hope that you will also jiayou and do your best in whatever you do! I'm sorry for being so busy, especially even during weekends when that's the only time you are available. I hope that it will be better in the coming months! :) ganbateh and thank you for everything, for always supporting and believing in me, listening to me, calling me though it's after lights out.. haha :) Love you ♥
Till next time! Peace!
-viv.
